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Tuesday, April 15, 2014 - Sexting vs Love-xting

You’ve heard of sexting—that’s when someone sends sexually explicit pictures or messages to someone else, usually via a text message on their smartphone. Often, these messages include pictures of one’s anatomy and, just as often, they end up being viewed by someone other than the intended recipient.  This can be embarrassing and can negatively affect your reputation and even your livelihood.  Just ask the ironically named, failed New York Mayoral candidate, Anthony Weiner.


You’ve probably heard of love-xting too. Okay, I just made that word up. But what it means, to me, is sending a text message to the one you love. This love-xt message can be any spontaneous expression of your love and affection for that special someone in your life.


More than just expressions of physical desire, love-xting shows the one you love that you care about them and that they’re on your mind. For the record, “I’m on my way home” and “Need anything from the store?” is not love-xting.


Communication, especially within a loving, intimate relationship, is a fascinating thing. Often, men and women communicate differently, and sometimes our words and ideas get lost in translation. One of my favorite books on this subject is Why Men Don't Listen and Women Can't Read Maps, by Allan and Barbara Pease. This book breaks down some of the differences between men and women and explains why we do the things we do. The authors discuss how the makeup of our brains causes us to perceive information and why we subsequently communicate what we have received, and perceived, differently.


Most men excel at performing one task at a time. They speak less and retain information better if it is presented clearly and without  distraction. Women, in general, are incredible at multitasking; they can speak and listen at the same time and incorporate far more non-verbal signals into their communication. Allen and Barbara Pease help men and women try to understand each other’s language. They enourage women to simplify their message and present it in a way that  can be heard without distractions. They encourage men to find their voice, and to use verbal and non-verbal signals to let their partner know they are receiving the message.


So what does this have to do with sexting or love-xting? Sending your partner a message to let them know you are thinking of them is a great way to turn up the heat and keep your relationship exciting. Don’t get stuck in a communication rut. Be creative and find fun and exciting ways to get your partner’s attention. Life gets crazy and sometimes we get caught up in the daily grind, but that’s no reason to lose touch with each other. Even though men and women communicate differently, it’s important to figure out how to get your spouse’s attention.


So, go ahead and send a thoughtful, loving message to the one you love.  Include intimate language, even pictures, if you want. Remember, though, that anything sent electronically will basically be out there forever.  And, just make sure that, before you hit send, you’ve addressed it correctly and it’s not going to your pastor, your mother, or to your best friend!


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About Dan Hope


has established himself as a leader in the Calgary real estate industry on a foundation of trust, enthusiasm, and tireless commitment. His goal in life is to empower and encourage the people around him, both personally and professionally. Dan was raised in Vancouver. He has always had a passion for real estate and bought his first house at 19 years old. For the last several years, he has lived and worked in the Calgary area. He deals with a wide range of clients and properties in various communities including Panorama Hills, Coventry Hills and North West Calgary. In addition to his real estate expertise, Dan is a certified couple's communication professional. His background allows him to have thorough understanding of the how making big decisions, like planning a move, is a big step for individuals and families. Dan Hope is proud to be part of RE/MAX, Canada's #1 Real Estate Company. He is a Top 10 Producer within his office. The Dan Hope Team upholds a high standard of excellence and fosters a positive and energizing environment. In a highly competitive and often volatile real estate market, Dan has the ability to transform challenges into opportunities. His optimism, generosity, and integrity are just a few of the reasons that Dan is highly recommended by his peers and former clients.

posted in General at Tue, 15 Apr 2014 15:47:05 +0000

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